It can be tempting to not go deeper. Oh believe me, it can be so tempting. Staying hollow, staying laid-back, it can seem so safe. But as women (though this trait often gets attributed to men) we're born for adventure. We're born to make an impact, and above all, we're born to live knowing we're loved by God. He designed us to soak in His strength each and every day.
You’re not good enough. You’re ugly. You’re not thin enough. You’re not smart enough. The voices get so loud that I can’t focus on anything else. As I stare into the mirror, the feeling that I’m worthless plagues my mind and suffocates me. My joy is gone. But what if our perspective meant more than our perfection?
I'll admit, control is an area that I struggle in. I try to manipulate situations to play out the way that I want. I have a hard time letting other people lead because I want control. And ultimately, I have a hard time giving things to God. We deceive ourselves into thinking that we have the ability to control things when in the end, God is the one who is sovereign.
He stepped down from heaven to move to earth. To us. The real estate wasn’t better, that’s for sure. His motivation wasn’t better scenery and a shorter commute. His move to us was to make a way for us to move toward Him.
If I were to imagine myself there in Bethlehem all those years ago, walking toward baby Jesus in His manger, I imagine I would be met with an inner conflict. Yes, this baby is to be the Savior of the world; however, I think I would be wrestling with the thought of how dirty I felt in His presence. He was born as an act of love to save me, yet if this baby could comprehend all the struggles in my brain and all the sins I wrestle with…well, wouldn’t that be a tad inappropriate?
Our identity is not in manliness or womanliness but godliness. It's less about sexual orientation and more about gospel orientation. We must find our identity in Christ. Then, and only then, can our hearts truly change. Then, and only then, will we love the things He loves.
Our culture gives us this unfortunate idea that we have to perfect ourselves. To truly be successful you need to eliminate all of your weaknesses. You need to hold your own. You need to keep it together. You need to be a completely well rounded person.
But how boring, really.
You will not wake up from your daydreaming with a closer relationship with God, a healthier body, a cleaner room, and a scrapbook full of adventures until you put in real action to get there.
People may not have been happy, but I felt freedom in knowing that my Savior was. Living a life modeled after Christ isn’t the norm. It takes strength and courage to stand up against the strong cultural current. And people aren’t going to like it.
To surrender our lives to God, His ways must be written on top of, over, above, across our hearts. His ways are higher. His ways are better.